This week has been half-term. I don’t have children (which is hopefully clear by now…), so how do I know this? The answer is because it’s what parents at work seem to enjoy talking about in the run up to it, during it (if they haven’t taken it off work) and after it.
It also appears that I am expected to know when half-term is – as well as every other holiday children get at school, which is nigh on impossible working in multi-location organisation which means that half-term happens at different times in different geographies…
“I can’t do that meeting, it’s half term”
“I can’t make that deadline, it’s half term”
“I’m dreading next week, it’s half term”
It got me thinking about working non-parents, like myself. Those that are around when half-term is happening, those who get the easier commutes, the recipients of the multiple out-of-office emails, those who benefit from time gained from the cancelled meetings and the quieter offices (or suffer due to the extra work and delayed projects).
Just about everything appears to be harder for parents – especially work. There’s the guilt of working in the first place, the childcare issues and the long days after sleepless nights. But one big working-parent perk is that you’re granted paid time off for making a personal lifestyle choice.
I did a quick straw poll of my childfree friends, and asked the childfree community on twitter what experiences non-parents face at work, and three key things came up…
1. Children are the ultimate trump card
This came up in just about every story I was told. Need to leave early to pick up your kid from school / because your kid is ill / because childcare plans have fallen through? Fine. Want to leave early for any other reason? Not so much. One friend was even told she couldn’t leave work early to take her relative to a chemo appointment yet watched a parent leave early because they had parent’s evening.
2. Non-parents are expected to be more flexible
Another common theme is that employers lean on non-parents to be more flexible than their parenting colleagues. I’ve heard stories from being expected to stay late with no notice, to being expected to work on weekends and having shifts swapped last minute on the assumption childfree people have nothing better to do.
3. Maternity / Paternity leave is unfair
This is the biggie. Whilst everyone I spoke to supports paid time off for new parents, they wished that they could also benefit from prolonged leave whilst still having the security of a job to go back to (and most importantly – whilst getting paid for it). One of my friends has been with her company for 10 years and is about to embark on a year-long unpaid sabbatical (paid ones don’t exist at the company) to travel the world – yet someone that started only a year ago is now taking a year off to have a baby – and gets the company’s generous maternity leave package as well. And it’s not just to pursue interests where this becomes an issue; friends have also had to take unpaid leave for caring responsibilities of older relatives too.
As well as the negatives, there were a couple of common positives that came up too. Firstly, being flexible has its advantages. Quite a few of my childfree friends have been able to take up opportunities that their parenting colleagues haven’t. This included stories about last minute exotic business trips, training opportunities which include week-long residential stays and being able to socialise more and therefore build stronger relationships (with the boss).
Secondly; holidays are a lot cheaper outside of term time! (#WINNING)
Whilst researching for this blog the subject of whether working mums have a better deal at work was tackled head on during Tuesday’s episode of Good Morning Britain. Holly Brockwell, a freelance journalist and fellow childfree woman, raised all of the issues above; the key one being that there is an assumption that kids come above everything else.
The counter argument was that this isn’t the fault of parents (and of course it isn’t) but the fault of the employers. So, what can employers do? Simple; understand that childfree people have lives outside of work too, that their free time and plans are just as important as those of their parenting peers and that staff are happier and more productive when they feel valued. We're the ones you lean on when you need flexibility remember? Keep us happy!
I’m lucky enough to work for an organisation where non-parents are treated well especially in regards to flexible working. However I’m still pushing to make CATernity leave a thing…
Mrs.T x
What I did this week: I was away with work at the beginning of the week and got back knackered late on Tuesday. Luckily I had a short working week as I had Friday off so spent it shopping in the morning and then at my favourite wine bar in the afternoon. On Saturday, me and Mr.T went out with friends for a slap up meal and made the most of the unexpected sunshine on Sunday by spending time in the garden and meeting up with friends for alfresco drinks.
What I didn’t do: Listen to unrelenting moans of “I’m bored” (but I know some people who did 😉)