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Writer's pictureMrs.T

Honey, I Didn't Have the Kids! Where are all the childfree characters in film and TV?

The film and TV industry has a lot to answer for when it comes to the misrepresentation of marginalised groups in society. However, there has been a definite shift in recent years as television and Hollywood producers have realised that their shows and characters need to reflect real life and that the old out-of-date (and usually offensive) stereotypes just don’t work anymore.


For example, there was a time when black people, gay people and those with disabilities were all cast in the same roles, namely; criminals, promiscuous best friends and helpless wannabes. And although there is still some way to go, it’s refreshing that we can turn on the TV or go to the cinema and see black doctors and professors, happily married gay couples and disabled characters in strong lead roles.


Similarly, there has been a marked increase in the number of shows breaking gender stereotypes too – yet there always seems to be one that sticks with women: motherhood (or the desire for it).


Childfree women, if featured at all, are generally categorised as one or more of the following:

  • Selfish

  • Unempathetic

  • Spinsters

  • Addicted to working

  • Child-haters

  • Desperate for a baby, but not found the “right man”

  • Childish

  • Masculine

If they are featured, then the fact they are childfree usually becomes central to their character; because they can’t find/keep a man, because they are infertile or because they are just too busy being evil.


(For the record, I’m not saying mothers don’t stereotyped too, it’s just that their associated traits are far more positive.)


Thanks to Pexels for the royalty-free image

Very rarely do you see a woman, and even rarer a married woman, that has made the decision to be childfree by choice and it not be a major part of the storyline. It seems that writers and directors struggle to move away from the common life script when it comes to women. When they do try, they give childfree women negative characteristics or, in the laziest of scriptwriting, make them change their mind.


Last week, The Big Bang Theory did just that. I’m not a fan of the show and haven’t watched it for a while, but the backlash on social media brought it to my attention. After hours of setting up Penny – a main character - as a woman who didn’t want children with her husband Leonard, they [spoiler alert] announced she was pregnant in the sitcom finale. Quite rightly, fans that had watched Penny tell Leonard she didn’t want kids at the beginning of the season and then again and again, episode after episode, were outraged.


It’s uninspired writing such as this which reinforces the stereotype that childfree women will ultimately change their minds; no matter how adamant they’ve been about it in the past.


There is one recent show that has actually done a good job of potraying a happy childfree couple; Ricky Gervais’ After Life. Although much of the content deals with Ricky’s character grieving after the loss of his wife, in flashbacks throughout the series we see happy times they have spent together with their dog. No mention of kids – in a really good way - just a normal, happy childfree couple.


Ricky is currently writing the second series and I can’t wait to see it. I’ll be really peeved if he puts a backstory in about trying to have kids but not managing – although given his stand-up about not having kids I remain hopeful!


So, I urge - and plead with - writers to BE MORE CREATIVE!


You don’t have to make every married couple have/want children!


Not every female character in a TV series or film needs to have a baby to validate their existence!


Female characters should not be defined by their motherhood status!


We’re seeing diversity in just about every other area – let’s try it with women too.


Mrs. T x


What I did this week: After attempting to get back to the gym after a far-too-long hiatus… I failed. However, I did manage to start the first assignment of my post-grad. OK, I mostly just made a few notes and ordered some books to reference but at least I’ve made a start! We got to see one of my husband’s best friends on Wednesday night and cook him dinner, which was lovely. I started my weekend off in the usual way with Friday afternoon off and drinks with a friend - we made the most of the unexpected sunshine on a nearby restaurant’s new rooftop bar.


On Saturday, Mr T and I went sofa shopping – such a middle-aged Saturday morning activity, but thanks to making an early start and prepping beforehand, we found the sofa we were looking for and get to get rid of our extremely uncomfortable current ones in around 7 weeks (hurrah!).


Being massive foodies, Mr.T and I also took advantage of the events happening nearby as part of Leeds Indie Food Fest; a vegan night at a café/arts venue round the corner and a School Diner set up in a nearby primary school which was essentially a group of food and drinks trucks in a playground – all yummy stuff! I definitely need to get back to the gym…


What I didn’t do: Have to spend an extra two hours in Ikea due to having a toddler with a mini-trolley in tow and the fulfillment of a time-in-the-play-area bribe (but I know someone who did 😉)

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